Trials, Tribulations & Escapades (mostly funny)

NYC

/ lintqueen / 1 Comment

Though it’s substantially colder here than what I packed for (highs seem to be in the low fifties, when weather.com told me last week while I was packing that it would be the low- to mid-70’s), I’m still having a swell time.

Sunday was a long travel day, but upon finally arriving I cheered up due to the immediate prospect of Japanese food (all I’d eaten so far was a handful of cereal and a Cinnabon …mmmmm…. cinnabon). Across the street from Jeff’s building (warning: possibly the worst website ever) is a great little place called Komegashi, where I got a noodle thing (cold soba) with tempura shrimp and a dipping sauce I cannot remember. Lesson for the future: just because the food comes on a little platform with a little bamboo mat across it, please do not assume that there’s a “floor” under the platform. Frustrated with trying to dip noodles into the dipping sauce, I dumped the dipping sauce on the noodles, where it rained down through the bamboo mat, onto the table and very nearly onto my lap. Oops.

Despite my sadness at misinterpreting the structural integrity of my plate, the evening was cheery in the end because we stopped at BABO, a tea house and gelateria — right across the street from Jeff’s place on the other corner!!! Life is *gooooooood*! I had “meringue” and mint chocolate chip and they were both marvelous … this place has excellent gelato.

Monday I worked. The VoIP stuff is behaving well, so telecommuting from here is really not much different than telecommuting from home, though it’s strange to be able to look out the window and see NYC. Monday night I decided that we must go experience Indian food in a neighborhood that all the Chowhounds said was chock-a-block with good Indian food (and is even apparently known as “little India!). So we caught took the Path (train)(1) two stops to Journal Square, walked a few blocks, and found *wonderful* food at Rasoi (where they were kind enough to make my Chicken Tikka Masala *very* very mild!). I’d also read on the Chowhound boards that an Indian ice cream shop was a must-visit, so even though we were bursting at the seams, we stopped in at a little ice cream shop where the owner apparently just wanted me to experience the full breadth of indian ice cream!

He said: “Today, you are the lucky ones. We will try all the ice creams. I will prepare for you a tasting…” and proceeded to lead me through tiny tasting spoon after tiny tasting spoon of indian eggless ice creams. Sometimes I knew the flavor (lychee= ick; pista=pistachio=mmmmmm), sometimes he could translate (gulkand=rose petals=WEIRD!!! Like eating perfume), and sometimes he knew the indian name and not the english translation (chicku=very odd), so I just tasted and enjoyed (or, in a few cases, not). The flavors that I was accustomed to (chocolate, english toffee, etc.) were very rich and quite good, but the fun was in trying the ones you wouldn’t find at the Harris Teeter.

I don’t know quite what I did to deserve such fine treatment, but when I finally decided on a large with english toffee and mango (thereby blending the familiar and comforting with the exotic and strange), he proceeded to add another two flavors to “make it look good” for me! I think I ended up with pistachio (it’s green at any rate) and some variant on the rose one. Because I was so full, I ended up taking most of it back to the apartment, where it awaits me (perhaps a snack this afternoon…)

Tuesday night we had a run of extremely good luck. After taking the ferry over to midtown, we discovered that there was a free-with-ferry-ride bus that would take us to 42nd (we had tickets to Spamalot on 44th). It was getting a bit late (already lmost 6 and the show started at 7) and I was getting a bit panicky about dinner, so we’d decided that when the bus stopped we’d just get off and find some quick (and hopefully cheap) eats to tide us over until after the show).

By some stroke of incredible good fortune the bus stopped right in front of (I think) Gray’s Papaya, the best “cheap eats” in all of NYC, according to many of the articles I’d read. Two hot dogs and a fruit smoothie for $2.75!

Then there’s Spamalot. LMAO! ROTFLOL!! And extremely surreal too, as Hank Azaria and David Hyde Pierce and Tim Curry spoke lines that I’ve heard (both watching the movie and recited by friends) hundreds of times. (caution: maybe some spoilers here, though I don’t think they really count, as all the reviews talk about the same thing, and we’re really not talking major plot twists here. Or even major plot, for that matter.) There were many references to other musicals (West Side Story, for instance) and performers (Liza Minnelli, I think) that all somehow got worked in to the somewhat re-directed plot about finding the grail and making a musical (!). Everyone could sing (which, I suppose, was to be expected, being that it was a musical and all, but I was still surprised when Tim Curry (as Lancelot) started really belting out a number (but then I realized that Rocky Horror Picture Show was also a musical!). Hank Azaria had many of the intrinsically funny and quotable bits, like the taunting French Knight, Tim the Sorcerer and the main Knight Who Formerly Said “Ni”). This worked exceptionally well, as Hank Azaria can do silly accents like no one’s business. One of the songs (“This is the Song that Goes Like This”) was a parody of the overwrought lovesong that’s found in most musicals (particularly those by Andrew Lloyd Webber) and contained one of my favorite verses ever:

And then we change the key!
Now we’re into E
That’s awfully high for me
But everyone can see
We should have stayed in D

I would see it again tonight if I could just to catch the bits I missed.

Post-show Jeff indulged me and we took the subway(2) to Serendipity (as featured in the John Cusack movie by the same name), where I had a frozen hot chocolate (honestly just a really good chocolate milkshake, but it was fun to go there, having seen the movie).

(1) I have discovered my personal trick to riding subway trains: stand perpendicular to the direction of the motion, preferably with a pole in front of you, though one to the side will also work). The reason this works (for me) is that most of the “jouncing” on trains is side-to-side as the train slews and careens on the track. By placing my feet shoulder width apart and orienting perpendicular to the motion, I absorb most of the back-and-forthing through the motion of my hips, which are quite accustomed to rocking side to side. When the train does abruptly brake or lurch forward, you still have that pole in front of you to grab onto to *and* my arms are stronger in this direction than they are when extended out to the side (or worse, over my head!). This discovery was a major revelation and has contributed greatly to my ongoing train comfort.

Interestingly, it doesn’t work for Jeff. My suspicion is that his hips don’t know how to rock-and-roll (he suffers from the curse of the white boy) and so he’s not effectively absorbing the motion.

(2) Subway signs LIE!!! Walking towards Spamalot, we passed a subway entrance that said you could take the R train from there. Upon leaving Spamalot I consulted my directions to get to Serendipity and noticed we could take the R to 60th & Lexington, get off, walk two blocks and we’d be there. So I directed Jeff back to the same subway entrance…

…where we walked down two flights of steps (which I still have to do one foot at a time, thanks to the bum knee), through, I dunno, *three* subterraneancity blocks, *down* another flight of stairs, down two rather steep ramps, through another block or so, then down an elevator (thank heavens we found the elevator) to reach the platform! The sign should have read something like “get on trains N and P right here or you can walk underground for a mile and get on train R”. Wow.

Tonight we see Star Wars. :-)

weekend update

/ lintqueen / 7 Comments

Thursday night my friend artykim and I drove down to Myrtle Beach for a “Girl’s Weekend” with Mary Jean (my roommate from high school) and three of her friends from Shelby (where she grew up), Linda, Susan and Becky. Kim and I yabbered the whole way down (except for the bit where we were slurping down our McFlurries — I <3 road trip food) *and* scored product goodness BIG TIME at a Walmart in, erm, Conway?, South Carolina (1).

Once at the beach, we proceded to get on with the main order of business, drinking. Two appletini’s and a bunch of catching up later, we fell into bed, exhausted, and slept for 10+ hours!

Friday, after a muffiny breakfast (and much needed coffee), we went for a golf cart ride around the resort, including a cruise by my most favorite house (which was on the market last summer when Jeff and I were there… for a measly $650,000ish :-O We also saw alligators (cute in a really ugly kind of way) and many many birds (most of which either Kim or Mary could identify, which was nifty).

Post-carting, Kim and I were bound and determined to get some beach time in, despite the fact that the weather was none-too-good to start with and the pressure was falling. We trundled off towards the beach (Mary was kind enough to drop us right at the beginning of the boardwalk for conservation-of-knee purposes) and, upon assembling the proper equipment (lovely, if heavy, beach chairs), started the beach-intensive portion of the vacation. We finally gave it up when the sky had darkened, the wind had starting blowing rather fiercely, we’d gotten a bit chilly, *and* Mary and Becky came down to the beach to fetch us as they’d seen the wetness coming.

Then the rain, rain, rain came down, down, down.

Eventually (feel free to insert “gabbing” during any unaccounted for periods of time in the narrative), we went to dinner at Bovine’s, a steakhouse, which is situated next to Devine’s, a seafood house, in the next little town over from Debordieu. We thought about writing the owners and telling them they should open a bar-b-que joint next door and call it Porcine’s, but then we remembered that we were in South Carolina and their idea of “bar-b-que” would not be the pulled pork which we knew and loved (we’re all North Carolinians, except for Kim, who has attained semi-native status at this point).

Back at the ranch, we made a giant vat of frozen lemon drop mix(2) and played board games. The first, called Sequence, was basically Tic-Tac-Toe with more variables, and the second, Taboo, is my favorite game ever. I have *many* words, which is a distinct advantage in Taboo.

Saturday (upon waking, late-ish, unsurprisingly, and seeing the rain, rain, rain come down, down, down) we decided to go shop, see a movie, have dinner and go to a dueling piano bar (really). We headed down to the outlet mall (where I scored a cute shirt and *fabulous* 50’s style dress [on UBER CLEARANCE!! 30% off the 40% off of the “Off Fifth” outlet price — yah me!] for a few hours, then on to Broadway at the Beach, a bizarre mash-up of mall, amusement park, restaurant row, bar strip, mini golf and movie theatre, where you can take the whole famdamily for a day’s fun (or so it would seem).

The movie was Monster in Law…it was ok, but not good enough I want to bother looking up a link for it. Then on to Landry’s, a pretty decent seafood restaurant (had fried oysters, which I’d have never known I’d like had it not been for ferociousbcycad, as I thought I hated oysters thanks to my one experience with raw (ew!) oysters with thebroomecloset… not his fault. His ex-girlfriend’s fault. ;-) Finally we rounded out the evening with a visit to Crocodile Rock (a dueling piano bar). Embarrassing admission: I *love* dueling piano bars.

It was an odd musical mix, though, as it apparently was Harley Bike Week at Myrtle and the bar was filled with hundreds of Harley guys and gals. The mix was heavy on the Southern Rock (Alabama, Skynard) and heavy metal/hard rock (Aerosmith, Poison). I did get them to play “Blister in the Sun” which was fun, and they did play some of the “classic” piano bar songs (“Piano Man” etc.), so it wasn’t all music I don’t entirely adore. That being said, the combination somewhat singable music, a fun bunch of girls and jello shooters served in giant faux syringes(3) turned out enormously well. We got home at 2:00am (it was an hour’s drive), and I had to pack, so I went to bed at 3:00am.

I got up at 8:30 to get ready to go to the airport (an hour away) for my 11:30 flight to DC for my 2:45 (delayed from 2:00 :( flight to NYC to the cab ride (Midtown tunnel closed due to construction…had to route up to the Queensboro Bridge) to the Path train to Jersey City (where Jeff’s place is). Arrived at 6:30, exhausted.

So, I’m in NYC telecommuting this week. And I think that catches me up.

(1) There’s this self-tanner, Jergens Natural Glow, that apparently works, even for the perpetually pallid such as myself (and one of the shades is “Light” as opposed to the “Black Hole Sun” shade that most self-tanners come in). It’s been in a bunch of mags, on TV and is hyped all over the ‘net, so I was determined to try it.

You can’t get it in the Triangle. It’s sold out at CVS, Eckerds, Walgreens and Walmart. Yes, I called them all. The CVS on Garrett was supposed to be getting a shipment last Wednesday, but when I called them to confirm, they told me they’d gotten notice that the warehouse was sold out.

They are selling on eBay for 1 for $11.00 (plus shipping and the ever-so-popular “handling”) or two for $20.00.

So, you can perhaps imagine my joy (even if you’re not a product junkie like I) when, upon stopping into Walmart for Visine (Tim & Kim have doggies and the essence-of-doggie in the car, though faint, was still making my eyes flip out a little), I actually remembered to go check the self-tanner department (as demarcated by a giant yellow awning hanging from the ceiling, covered in beach balls and deck chairs) and found *six* bottles of the much sought-after lotion. Kim bought one. I bought the other five, figuring that even if it doesn’t work on me, there’s always eBay… :-)

(2) This was a great idea in concept: big plastic bucket full of stuff, which you add vodka to, stir and freeze. The execution, however, was flawed, as it didn’t taste anything like a lemon drop, particularly not the yummy ones that Steve makes. It was sooooooo bitter (not sour, really) that I had to add four Sweet-n-Lows and two spoonfuls of sugar before I could drink it!

(3) Thereby solving the number one problem of jello shooters — how to get the jello out of the little cup. These you just squirt into your mouth — whee!!!

One more oddity

/ lintqueen / 7 Comments

Of late, I’ve been watching Sex & the City (yes, I know, I’m like 40 million years *after* the fact on this one, but they’re on TBS now!) and at this point in the series Carrie is dating “the Russian,” played by Mikhail Baryshnikov.  The whole time I am watching these episodes I’m thinking to myself “he’s vaguely familiar”, but attributing that to the fact that he’s Mikhail Baryshnikov and that I’ve seen him in other things before.

…

(ok, the ellipses are [ellipsis is?] a complete cop-out as far as narrative structure goes, but I’m tired)

When I was at Duke, I worked in Tech Support to earn spending money.  Mostly I did light hangs and sound checks, but every once in a while, Mark Kitchens, the Tech Support manager would call me with an interesting opportunity, like working a show (I saw Fine Young Cannibals, amongst others, that way).

Early1 one Saturday morning, Mark called me and said he had a gig for me that he was _sure_ that I’d want to take, but he wouldn’t tell me what it was.  I trusted him though, so I got dressed and headed over to the office to see what needed doing.

There was a VCR that needed setting up.  In a guest room at the Washington Duke Inn.  In Mikhail Baryshnikov’s2 guest room at the Washington Duke Inn.

Yes, I met him.  Yes, he’s just as …mmmmm…. in person.  Yes, it took me three episodes to put the two and two together to get the four.  :-)

1 Back then, as now, “early” means anything prior to 8:30am.  That’s not to say that I get up at 8:30, oh no…in fact, I often get up much later than that.  But when I have to *do* anything before 8:30, then I consider it “early” (and try to avoid it whenever possible).

2He was on campus doing Stephen Berkoff’s “Metamorphosis,” based on the Kafka novel.

Stupid way to injure yourself, #112

/ lintqueen / 13 Comments
  1. paint your nails occasionally
  2. sometime, when you think of it, forget to tighten lid on a bottle of nailpolish
  3. set said nailpolish bottle on your bedside table
  4. knock it over
  5. discover it several days later
  6. bemoan the slow leak which has become a puddle, affixing your bottle to the tabletop
  7. pry the sucker off, using a screwdriver
  8. bemoan the fact that you took some of the nightstand varnish with the bottle
  9. use the nailpolish to refinish the bit of the nightstand you just de-varnished (well, it’s not like it was a *nice* nightstand)
  10. return nailpolish to its rightful home (the spiceracks on the closet wall where all the nailpolishes live…clever, eh?)
  11. forget
  12. for a long time
  13. decide, on the spur of the moment, that you need to paint your nails (heck, you’re going out to see Xanadu…now that’s a nailpolish-worthy occasion)
  14. try three bottles of nailpolish whose caps are thoroughly stuck on (it has been a while since you’ve painted your nails, hasn’t it?)
  15. think about using your teeth to open one of the stuck ones
  16. think about the three crowns you already have and decide that’s a bad idea (for once!)
  17. find a bottle of nailpolish whose cap seems to be willing to turn, if somewhat reluctantly
  18. rejoice
  19. grab the bottle in one hand and the cap in the other and tttwwwwwwiiiiiiiissssssttttt
  20. OW!!!
  21. look down at thumb
  22. notice the blood
  23. realize that there’s a knife-like shard of dried nailpolish stuck to the side of the bottle that you just dragged your thumb across
  24. wonder why there’s this flat, sharp nailpolish blob on the bottle

25. remember the nightstand
26. find the liquid bandage
27. sigh

Weekend in review

/ lintqueen / 9 Comments

So the weekend, all told, was pretty good.  Saturday night Jeff and I went out to Thai Palace in Chapel Hill, where the Tom Kha Gai was not as good as normal, but the Mee Krob and spring rolls were delicious.  Before we left for the restaurant, Jeff had the foresight to think to call Target to see if they had wheelchairs — and they do!  After dinner, we headed over to the Target were I was darned pleased to be able to scoot around in their motorized wheelchairs — free and unencumbered.  Sadly, I am not a particularly good motorized wheelchair driver, and every time you back one of those suckers up it *beeps beeps beeps* loudly, calling attention to the fact that you’re not a very good driver.

Earlier in the week, my friend Kim came to visit and brought me both a delicious dinner and Peeps treats, including a peeps egg-dying kit.  Now, I love to dye eggs… it’s part of the whole holidays-being-a-big-deal when I was a little girl.  We took come again-Harding, tree-decorating and Easter egg-dying quite seriously, spending hours and hours perfecting our designs and executing them.  Many years ago, I had an egg dyeing brunch at my house and had friends over to dye Easter eggs… that was a great deal of fun, but I haven’t had the opportunity to dye eggs ever since, so I let at the opportunity.

Sunday morning, Jeff and I dyed Easter eggs — and it was a blast!  I don’t think he completely understood the seriousness with which I approach projects like this, so he might have been surprised by my requests for crayons, masking tape, candles, the spare egg dyeing hooks that I keep in the junk drawer (no kidding, really I do), etc. In fact, he only vaguely remembered dying eggs as a child himself, and seemed to think that dyeing eggs consisted primarily of dumping them in a single color, and then eventually fishing them out.  I showed him the joy that Easter egg dyeing could be (and his eggs were quite pretty!).  The best yet, later this week I’ll devil them …mmmmmmmmm… deviled eggs..

Sunday afternoon, I decided I needed sustenance of substance for dinner, and wanted a stake.  Jeff was kind enough to run to the grocery store and get steak and sweet potatoes for me.  While he was gone, I broiled some asparagus that we had on hand with butter, olive oil, lemon juice and sliced almonds to go alongside (note: cooking on crutches is no more fun than any of the other routine things to do on crutches. feh.)

He came home with not only steak and sweet potatoes, but also an Easter lily, which I’ve always wanted, but never had.  I didn’t realize that they smelled so good…

Then, after dinner — super-treat!! — Jeff brought out the cupcakes that he’d gotten for me from the store (at the Target the night previous, I’d had fits over the woman in front of us in-line, who had cupcakes..), and we watched the remake of The Avengers, which was actually pretty terrible.  Oh well, the cupcakes were delicious.

Updates

/ lintqueen / 2 Comments

yowsa.  Apparently, it also understands how to do actions that are in the program window.  For example, I use Semagic to post my blog entries.  When I said “post entry”, it understood that I meant to post the entry to LiveJournal.

Okay, okay.  Enough being amazed by technology.

Knee updates:
the pain, for the most part, is much better.  I’m down to taking one OxyContin (time released version of oxycodone) at night, and lots and lots of ibuprofen during the day (which will help with the swelling, I’m told.)  I am doing my physical therapy, though honestly not as much as I probably should. (It hurts). Next week, I see Dr. Higgins again, and hopefully at that time he’ll clear me to unlock the leg brace, which might mean I’ll be able to drive again.

Other than the pain, the helplessness and trapped feeling that results from being unable to leave the house has been the worst part of this.  Most of the time, I’m really happy to be an extrovert, but times like this, I wish I could be happy just sitting at home “with time to myself”.  Again, counting my blessings, I really was out of it for the first week and a half (if you called me and I don’t remember it, don’t be offended… it’s because I’m not remembering anything from that time… sorry), so the passage of time wasn’t so excruciatingly slow then, but the last two weeks time has dripped by like molasses that’s been cooled in the fridge for several months.  All of this has been exacerbated by the fact that most of my normal craft pursuits are impossible in my limited mobility state.  The sewing machine — she is upstairs.  The stamps and paints and grommets and scissors — they are upstairs.  The beads, they are downstairs.  However, they are in a place where non-bendy leg space makes them inaccessible.  Oh so sad.  Plus, beads really need to be done over a desk or table or some other flatness, which my lap is not, so that they don’t all goes skittering away.

So that leaves me with knitting, which is well and good as I like knitting; however, I don’t yet have the mental stamina to tackle anything more complex than going round and round and round in a circle.  So I’m making a purse to be felted.  I had run out of black wool, but thankfully, my friend Kim is coming over tonight and bringing both Chinese food (yah!) and black wool.  And company.  Blessed, blessed company.

Dictation software

/ lintqueen / 3 Comments

As most of you know, I hate typing.  This is probably the single most important reason that I don’t update my blog very often.  All day, every day at work, I type, and by the end of the day I am just plain sick of it.

… and my fingers hurt (moan and whine)

So, this is a test.  I have bought Dragon Naturally Speaking Version 8.  I am attempting to to dictate this entry, though I’ve had to cheat twice.  I’m not sure yet how to make Dragon soft used to my parenthetical statements, as they seem to be confusing it.

That being said, for the most part, the bloody sucker seems to be working very very well.  Many moons ago, I had purchased a speech recognition software package, but it didn’t work at all.

I still have to talk more slowly than I would normally, but that’s not saying a lot since I’ve been told.  I speak to quickly anyway.  It’s probably not a bad thing for me to learn to enunciate and speak more slowly, at least when I want to.

Theoretically, this will get better the longer I go on as long as I’m patient with correcting it, which I will try to be.  At least it doesn’t sass me.  ;-)

Color me astonished.  It knows what I mean when I say quote “winky-face“

Things I’ve learned

/ lintqueen / Leave a comment
  1. The keys to making a Wendy’s Mandarin Chicken Salad food:
    -drain the sucker. Take the lid, use it as a strainer thing, and dump out all the extraneous liquid that’s probably accumulated at the bottom.
    -use all the crunchies
    -don’t skimp on the dressing
    -don’t feel you have to eat all the chicken. Some of it will be odd, having sat in the liquid mentioned above.
  2. Getting *into* the shower when you are mobility-compromised is *NOT* the same from a physics perspective as getting *out* of the shower. Think this through before attempting same.
  3. Big metal leg braces *can* be modified to better fit your leg, even if your leg is not stick straight and five feet long (which is the athletic sort this brace seems designed to fit). The “sticks” (the metal uprights that run along the inside and outside of your leg) can be bent. The velcro bands can be cut, so that they can close around your ankles without overlapping for half again their length. Do these things before you wear the brace for a week and a half. You’ll be much happier.
  4. Get extra Ace-or-their-equivalent bandages. Your physical therapist probably has some on hand he’ll give you, if you ask nicely. It’s nice being able to alternate them through the wash.
  5. Flannel sheets, whilst nice under normal circumstances, are Not So Great when you’re sleeping in a biggum brace that almost guarantees that you’ll not flip once during the evening. Puddley flannel. Ick.
  6. Friends are *wonderful*. Friends that bring you treats are irreplaceable. Friends that’ll come over and keep you company when you’re all loopy on codeine are priceless. For everything else, there’s Mastercard.
  7. Irish Cream with cookie dough ice cream is the best thing EVAR!

OK, that’s it for now.

/ lintqueen / 3 Comments

More updates.

DANG my KNEE HURTS!!! Went to physio today and stiches were taken out (cried like a little baby girl, I did). Plus did lots of bendy things with my knee that made awful noises and felt worse.

This is going to be a long six weeks (the duration of time I’ll be strapped in this damn brace).

And on knon-knee matters:
I saw something in a movie tonight (the original Thomas Crown Affair, which, unfortunately was one of those movies that move too slowly and bore me, so I didn’t finish it… or maybe that’s just the codeine talking) that made me notice something that used to be commonplace in my life that’s now vanished completely: calling a telephone number to find out the correct time. I used to phone the local time line at least once a month to make sure all my clocks were right, and I’ve not done that in at least 7 years now. Odd.