“[…] most singles are leaning against the bar, sighing, waiting for somebody — anybody — to happen by. The social swirl is a fallacy, at least after age 30 or so, when all the normal people get married. But like all fallacies — like the I’m-Crashing-Through-the-Jungle-in-My-Big-SUV delusion — people cling to it.
Thus the pressure from married friends. We are not, as the single people writing Rich seem to suggest, the malicious band of sideshow deformities in Tod Browning’s “Freaks,” keen to pull the unmarried into our nightmare as we chant, “You are one of us.”
Rather, in our eyes, we are trying to help our single friends salvage what’s left of their lives before the years pass, irretrievable. Single people are cowards and it pains us to see them strut around in their narrow boxes, declaring them the whole wide world.”
Yes, it’s a shallow, one-sided, rather silly article. That being said, is it any wonder I’m anxious about my single-dom knowing that people actually think like this? Do my co-workers or random acquaintances think I’m a loser for still being single… at 35? I know my own grandmother sees my perpetual oneness as some sort of failure.
This is striking more of a reaction in me than it might otherwise because my “last single friend”* is now getting married. She’s the one who always gave me hope, because she’s fabulous: funny, cute, successful, extremely smart and very nice (sometimes to a fault) — and if she was still single, then there was hope for me. But now she’s engaged and will be married in June. I am thrilled for her, and the fellow she’s marrying is great, but I admit, it’s caused my spirits to flag a wee bit.
*I do have other single friends, but mostly they’ve either (a) been married already or (b) don’t *want* to be married, which is an altogether different thing.