Funny

funnies

Boys & Gifts

/ lintqueen / 1 Comment

So Jeff has some “gift exchange” at his work today (one of the ones where everyone brings a gift and they’re exchanged randomly)… and of course he didn’t think about it until last night (not his fault, really, we’ve been busy). At the point he mentioned it to me, Jeff had decided he was going to contribute a router (!) to the exchange, but they’re all geeks, so that might actually have worked, but I was a little… .um… confsed, as that doesn’t (in my mind) fall into the realm of “gift” so much as “appliance”.

So we started running through other possiblilities….

Gina: Do you have spare gifts?”
Jeff: “No”
(I do, of course,but they’re at my house)
Gina: “How about a bottle of wine and a box of chocolates?”
Jeff: “OOOH! I have a nice box of chocolates that my housekeeper, Dave, left me for Christmas. And I have wine!”
Gina: “Hey, that’ll work!”
Jeff: “You think that’s ok?”
Gina: “Sure… the likelihood that Dave will intersect with any of these guys is so low that you’re out of the Re-Gifting Danger Zone*.”
Jeff: “oh.”
pause
Jeff:“He cleans two of their houses”
Gina: “JEFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!!”
Gina: “Um, yeah, that would be *bad*. ‘Cause I’m pretty sure that if he left *you* chocolates — as special as you are — he also left *them* chocolates….”

It *slays* me that he thought about the chocolates, but didn’t quite get to the point where he realized that at least two of the other guys would’ve gotten the same chocolates from the same source, thereby giving the gig away…

* ED NOTE: I actually almost never re-gift, unless it’s something like a White Elephant gift exchange… I’m just too nervous about the whole thing (and given the story above… understandably, I think! ;-)

I hate being a complete dork

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I think the worst kind of Doing A Stupid Thing is the kind where you think about doing a Thing (in this case opening a padded mailer envelope by ripping into it with abandon), then thinking that perhaps that’s not such a good idea after all (what if it’s full of messy bits that will fall all over your kitchen floor?), then convincing yourself you’re being silly and paranoid (don’t be rediculous, Gina, it’s an *envelope*, not something messy like a mostly-full vacuum bag), doing the Thing (ripping the mailer open, with abandon, of course), only to discover your weird little paranoia was, in fact, some sort of prescient warning that you had, in great folly, ignored. And there are little grey fuzzy bits (not unlike, BTW, what you might find in a mostly-full vacuum bag) scattered all over your kitchen floor.

Drug usage

/ lintqueen / 2 Comments

side note: apparently heavy drugs (of the cold medicine sort) affect one’s ability to correctly type/speak. So far today I’ve used a “to” in place of “too”, extraneously apostrphied three S’s, nearly confused “affect” and “effect”, and (worst yet) very nearly used you’re when I meant your.

If I start “quoting” things I will resign myself to grammatical incompetence and go straight to bed.

funny IM conversation

/ lintqueen / 1 Comment

background The cereal in question is a high-fiber sticks and rocks mix that we concoct)

ginathelintqueen: The big tub of cereal spilled in my car on the way home
jb4422: :(
jb4422: I’m sorry!
ginathelintqueen: s’ok
ginathelintqueen: will make a bunch of birdies happy at any rate
jb4422: birdies!
jb4422: you threw it out?
ginathelintqueen: the stuff that spilled into my car floor?
ginathelintqueen: yes
jb4422: was all of tub? just some
ginathelintqueen: some
jb4422: birdies will be regular!
jb4422: :)
ginathelintqueen: OMG that’s funny

Color meme

/ lintqueen / 3 Comments
you are magenta
#FF00FF

Your dominant hues are red and blue. You’re confident and like showing people new ideas. You play well with others and can be very influential if you want to be.Your saturation level is very high – you are all about getting things done. The world may think you work too hard but you have a lot to show for it, and it keeps you going. You shouldn’t be afraid to lead people, because if you’re doing it, it’ll be done right.

Your outlook on life is very bright. You are sunny and optimistic about life and others find it very encouraging, but remember to tone it down if you sense irritation.
the spacefem.com html color quiz

I write like a boy!!!!

/ lintqueen / 3 Comments

Via This Woman’s Work:

Acording to The Gender Genie I write like a boy!

“Inspired by an article in The New York Times Magazine, the Gender Genie uses a simplified version of an algorithm developed by Moshe Koppel, Bar-Ilan University in Israel, and Shlomo Argamon, Illinois Institute of Technology, to predict the gender of an author.”

I submitted four samples of writing off my website and all four of them were scored as man-style writing (“man-style” is my word, but I kinda like it).

Weird.

Female Score: 0
Male Score: 309

The Gender Genie thinks the author of this passage is: male!

More meme spreading

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Via Absolutely Vile, original here. You are to cross out the characteristics that don’t apply to you:

SEPTEMBER:
Suave and compromising. Careful, cautious and organized. Likes to point out people’s mistakes. Likes to criticize. (I wouldn’t say I *like* it, just that sometimes I can’t help it… :/ Stubborn. Quiet (ROTFLOL!) but able to talk well. Calm and cool. (I am calm in a real emergency situation but on a daily basis I’m rather excitable). Kind and sympathetic. Concerned and detailed. Loyal but not always honest I am always honest. Perhaps not completely forthright, but always honest. Does work well. Very confident. Sensitive.Thinking generous. Good memory. Clever and knowledgeable. Loves to look for information. Must control oneself when criticizing. Able to motivate oneself. Understanding. Fun to be around. Secretive. Loves sports, leisure and traveling. Hardly shows emotions. Tends to bottle up feelings. (that one’s so wrong it’s not even funny!) Very choosy, especially in relationships. Systematic

80’s music quiz

/ lintqueen / 2 Comments

I either get a 63 (if I choose “Woodstock”, which is accurate but not really true, and an 87 if I say “Just Say No”)

My favorite things I said today:

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The whole triangle (IMHO) rocks… so much to do, yet not overwhelming. (I’d much rather be a biggish fish in a medium-sized pond than a wee guppy in the ocean, if you know what I mean. Especially if the pond’s got good Thai restaurants and sushi. But then that might make me a cannibalistic fish, which would be gross….)

Hiccups

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I used to love them.

Now I hate them.

And I have them.

GRRRRR.